The Promise of Hope
by Dooba
Summary: Reported missing in action: Edward Anthony Cullen, soldier, the telegram said. Bella's life shattered then and there. Where is Edward? Is he still alive? Will they ever see each other again? Christmas colab with Sherryola. AH M
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: We don't own Twilight.**

_Author Notes_

_Welcome to a little Christmas surprise, a colab between Sherryola and me, a gift from us to our readers to thank you for being so great to us over the past year. This will be a short story, six chapters, beginning today and ending Christmas Day. We will post simultaneously on our individual profiles. Sherry will be writing Edward, and I will be writing Bella. _

_James in this story is dedicated to Divine Inspiration and Shelikesthesound in honor of the Diva. _

_Enjoy, and happy holidays!_

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><p><strong>Edward<strong>

I lay on my back in the sun. Bella was lying next to me, her head on my chest, her long hair spread around her. We were in our meadow on a rare sunny day in Forks. A picnic basket sat apart from us, remnants of our lunch showing inside.

"You're so beautiful," I murmured, "I love you so much."

"I love you, too," she whispered back, "And just think, one week from today, we'll be married. I can't wait to be your wife."

"Me either."

I ran my hands through her silky hair, down her back, pulling her closer to me.

We kissed for a long time. The feel of her body pressed against mine made me hard with wanting her.

"I want you," she breathed, "Make love to me."

I turned us so I was lying on top. I reached for her shirt, but suddenly, she was gone.

"Bella, Bella," I cried into nothingness, "Bella where are you? Bella, come back."

I awoke with a shudder. There were tears on my cheeks, and I no longer felt ashamed of tears. They told me I was still alive, still me, Edward Cullen, still in love with my wife and still hanging on to a shred of hope.

It was cold. It was dark. How long had I been in this hole or cell, whatever it was anyway? A day? A week? A year? Ten? I couldn't remember anymore. I couldn't even remember if it was day or night. Everything ran together in monotonous patterns.

I was hungry. I was always hungry these days.

I ran my hands over my face, feeling the beard, tugging at my hair. It was long now. I'd never worn a beard before. Would Bella even recognize me? But rebel captors don't really give a damn about niceties like haircuts and shaving. It surprised me that from time to time, they even gave me a pale of cold water to wash myself.

They didn't talk to me much. Most of them didn't speak English. In the beginning, they'd tried to get info out of me, but I didn't have any important info to give, and besides, I wouldn't give in to them, no matter what.

I was so lonely. I ached for my wife with a yearning, gnawing ache that hadn't diminished one bit since my captivity. Sometimes, I thought that her memory was the only thing keeping me sane. I wanted to get out of that damn cell. I wanted to go home.

I lay back and remembered how I'd gotten into this hellhole.

I had been on patrol with my squad the day everything went to hell.

"It's so fucking hot," my buddy James had grumbled, "This damn desert is going to kill me."

"No kidding," I agreed, "I sure miss Washington, rain, green. Bella, my family."

"This is going to be your last stint," James said, "What are you gonna do after you get out?"

"I'm going to finish getting my medical degree and then go into practice with my dad."

"After you finish making love to Bella for two years without stop," James laughed.

"Fucker," I laughed back.

Bella and I had been high school sweethearts. I know that stuff doesn't usually last, but it had for us. We'd gone to college together and gotten married after graduating. I'd started medical school, but somewhere along the line, I'd felt compelled to join the army to help the effort in Iraq. They needed medics, and I wanted to help.

It was the biggest fight Bella and I had ever had. She didn't want me to go. Eventually, she accepted it, and I promised no matter what, I'd come home to her.

When my first tour of duty was over, I came home, taking her into my arms and kissing her hard.

"See, I told you I'd always come home to you," I told her, "Even if I have to crawl, I'm always coming home to you."

She didn't say much when I went on the next tour of duty, but when I decided to go back for one more she was terrified. She said she had a bad feeling about it.

I left her with my same promise, a promise that I would be coming home.

James nudged me out of my thoughts of Bella and that last conversation.

"You still want me to come to Forks with you when the time comes?" James asked.

"Yeah, man, of course I do," I assured him, "I told Bella, and she agrees. You don't have any family, and I've got more than enough to go around. Bella's dad says he'll give you a job in the police department if you want. They can't wait to meet you."

"You know I might steal your lovely wife," James teased.

"Asshole," I teased back, "Nothing can come between Bella and me. But don't be surprised if she and my mom, sister and sister-in-law don't try to set you up."

We had laughed together, the last laughter I would know for a very long time.

They had come at us out of nowhere, a band of rebels, a bomb. Some of my squad was injured, and of course, I stopped to help them, getting injured myself.

"Cullen, come on," James had screamed.

I was kneeling beside a boy who had gotten a direct hit in the gut and was bleeding out. I couldn't leave him.

"Go, go, go!" I yelled back at James, "Get the men to safety. James, when you get home, tell Bella—tell her I love her."

James stared at me for a long moment, but he knew his first responsibility was to take care of the rest of the squad. He nodded sadly, as the rebels surrounded me.

That was the last thing I saw before losing consciousness. When I awoke, I was a prisoner of some unknown rebel group. I had no idea where I was or if I'd ever be released. I clung to the memories of my pre Iraq life, particularly to the memories of my Bella.

Sometimes, I dreamed of the smell of my mom's apple pie baking. Sometimes, I dreamed of the strawberry fragrance of Bella's shampoo. Memories of home were never far away. They both comforted me and tore me apart, remembering everything I'd had, everything I'd lost.

I sat up, hugging my knees to my chest, sending out the thought I sent all the time. Wishing, hoping somehow, my Bella could know.

"Be safe my love," I whispered, "Be happy. I'm so sorry I couldn't keep my promise to you this time. I love you."


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N Twilight is not ours.**

_Thank you for the wonderful response so far! We just wanted to give you a heads-up: we call this a Christmas story for a reason. Have a little faith in us! _

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><p><strong>Bella<strong>

The sharp sound of my phone rang through the silent house. Jake looked up at the noise and then looked at me before his head dropped to my lap again.

I didn't feel like moving. After two rings, the answering machine started.

"Hi, this is Bella. Leave a message." Even to myself, my voice sounded sad.

"Bella, it's Rosalie. Are you home? Please pick up."

With a sigh, I unfolded my stiff frame from the couch. I had been sitting in the same position for too long again. I didn't care. Not really. Not anymore.

As I walked to the other room where my phone was lying on the side table, my loyal black lab Jacob followed me, his paws clicking softly on the hardwood floor.

I picked up the receiver and pushed the button to turn it on. I wasn't hurrying. Rosalie knew it could take a minute for me to reach the phone. I never just answered. I had become too weary long since of solicitors and marketers, and other people who wanted something from me.

And if the caller didn't identify himself, I never answered at all. Like yesterday. Someone had called and hung up without a word. I hadn't even bothered to check the number.

"Hey, Rosalie," I said, cringing at the desolate tone of my voice.

"Hey sweetie," she replied. "How are you?"

I shrugged, realizing belatedly that she wouldn't be able to see that through the phone. "I'm fine."

"Oh, Bella," she said, and the genuine concern in her voice brought a lump to my throat.

I sighed, willing the tears away. I didn't want to break down with Rosalie on the phone. Instead I crouched down and patted Jake on the head, trying to distract myself.

"What are you doing tonight?" Rosalie asked, pulling me from my thoughts.

"Tonight?" What was so special about tonight?

"It's Christmas Eve, honey. Surely you're not planning on spending tonight alone?"

I exhaled, surprised. Had I lost track of time so completely that I forgot Christmas had arrived? Christmas Eve... I wanted to curl up in bed and weep and weep.

"Actually, yes," I replied, hoping to sound convincing.

"No way, Bella. We won't allow you. Come over to Esme's and Carlisle's. We will all be there."

"No, Rosalie. I really want to be alone tonight."

Silence on the other end of the line. "Are you sure, Bella?"

"Yes, Rosalie," I pressed.

"I don't like it," she said. "I don't like it at all."

"I don't want to burden you with my sulking company," I said. "Really, you go and have fun." I couldn't prevent the bitterness from seeping in my tone.

Rosalie was silent for a moment. "We miss him too, you know."

"I know," I replied shortly. We hung up, and I sunk to my knees on the floor, the tears that had been threatening all this time breaking through.

Jacob came to me, nudging my leg with his snout, trying to comfort me in the only way he knew how. But I couldn't stop crying. Rosalie was wrong. They couldn't miss him as much as I did. For almost a year and a half I had had to live without him, and every second that he was not here, I died a little bit more inside.

How was I supposed to move on? How could I ever again be happy? And now it was Christmas. The second Christmas I would have to spend without him. It almost felt like it hurt more than the first.

I wanted to sleep and never wake up again.

Instead, I dragged myself from the floor, washed my face at the kitchen sink, and started to clean the house. It was my only distraction, even if there was not much to clean.

As I opened a drawer to put away some paperwork, my eye fell on the single piece of paper in the drawer that had made my life shatter into a million pieces. A telegram, mocking me with the few simple words that ruined my future.

_Reported missing in action: Edward Anthony Cullen, soldier._

I picked up the paper, touching his name with my fingertips. Missing meant that he wasn't found dead. But after all this time, I was told to assume the worst. Search parties had not found him. I was told that I had to learn to live with the fact that he might never come home again.

I choked up at the thought alone. There was no way I could ever accept that. Not until I had seen his lifeless body with my own eyes would I ever assume for one minute that he was dead. But then where was he? Ever since he had gone missing I had been haunted by the most horrible nightmares. I knew the stories about torture, and even if they didn't hurt him, they weren't known to treat their prisoners nicely.

My poor man. I couldn't imagine his strong, lithe body locked up in a cell, or worse. I didn't dare to imagine him dead somewhere, undiscovered, anonymous.

No. I couldn't think of that.

I thought back to our wedding day, that perfect day. The sun had shone, a rarity in Forks. I had never seen Edward so happy.

I dreamed of that day, often. Dreamed of him smiling in the sun. But every time I would reach out my hand to lay it in his, he would disappear, and I would wake up with tears on my cheeks and a broken, empty heart.

Those nights were the worst.

During medical school, he had gotten the ridiculous idea in his head that he wanted to serve the country. He wanted to join the army. It was the biggest fight we'd ever had. The only fight, even, I think now.

He had gone on a few missions and came home unscathed. The relief every time I could wrap him in my arms again was impossible to describe. "I promised I would come back home to you," he'd whisper in my ear, invariably.

The last time he went, I'd had a bad feeling. I begged him not to go. He told me it would be his last mission. He promised me he'd come back.

I sighed, desperate loneliness washing over me as I recalled how he turned around to wave one last time before he disappeared from my sight.

In the back of my mind, a frail sound asked my attention. Pulled from my thoughts, I heard my baby crying. Our baby. David Edward Cullen. Conceived just before Edward left for his mission in Iraq. We didn't know then, of course. When he had been gone for about two months, the news of my pregnancy was a pleasant surprise. The baby would be born right about when Edward should be coming home. He might even be there at the birth. I couldn't wait to tell him.

The telegram came a day later. Everything shattered. His sister Alice had been with me when I answered the door, and she caught me when my knees buckled.

I was desolate, desperate. I felt my life stopped the moment I could no longer be sure if he was still living his.

I could not move on until I had certainty. Sure, my family and even his family had hinted that I should start accepting that he might never come back.

I could not. I would not. Ever.

They wouldn't understand how I felt. Not his parents, Carlisle and Esme, or their other children, Alice and Emmett, Edward's brother and sister. Married respectively to Jasper and Rosalie, they were a close-knit family. They had kept me going all this time, supporting me, helping me raise David as a single mom, not a widow, but not a wife, either. They were invaluable. Still, I couldn't help but think that my loneliness was more profound than theirs. I lost my soulmate, and as news about Edward remained absent, I felt more and more desperate.

The crying got louder. David was hungry. I recognized the meaning of his cries. Our baby, the only light in my life. The reason I found the energy to move on, to give him the love he needed. He was such a sweet little child. The spitting image of his father. I knew our baby as well as I had once known my husband. I still wore his ring. Of course I did.

Looking back at the telegram, I stared at the letters until my vision blurred. A lone tear escaped and trailed down my cheek.

"You promised you'd come home to me," I whispered, my voice breaking. "Please, baby, please come back home to me."


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N We don't own Twilight.**

_Thanks for such a warm reaction to this story! Some questions answered in this chapter. Enjoy!_

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><p><strong>Edward<strong>

Another day or night. Another week or year. Time passed and I struggled to keep holding on to that tiny spark of hope. My dreams of Bella continued, her sweet voice, her beautiful smile, her gentle touch. She haunted me in my sleep, and I clung to the ghost of her. She was the only reason I kept hanging on, the reason hope couldn't quite die.

Given my generic rank, my captors kept me alive for one purpose only, pain. It came in many forms, from starvation and dehydration, to beatings and more beatings. The pain often brought hallucinations of my angel, my Bella. She watched over me and kept me sane.

One day, my captors came in and told me that it was over. Not my part, of course. They told me my people, the armed forces of my country were being withdrawn. Everyone was going home, at last.

Everyone but me, and God knew how many others like me, lost, missing in action.

"Thank God," I muttered, my voice raspy from lack of use.

I worried. Would anyone look for me? Would I just be left behind, deserted? Did they all think I was dead? Did Bella think I had died? What would it do to my love to think I had died?

I shook my head. No, James saw me get captured, I remembered seeing his face as the rebels surrounded me, just before I lost consciousness. He was as close as my brother, and he would not stop believing. He would follow my last request of him. He would find Bella and tell her I was not dead.

Wouldn't he? What if he didn't? What if he forgot? The constant thoughts nagged at me, making me sick with fear. Was James even still alive? In this dangerous volatile land, it was more than possible that James was another casualty.

But I couldn't give up. I couldn't let go of that last thread.

"Bella, my Bella, my life, my love. Don't give up on me. Please."

I was startled from a fitful sleep. There was a sound of crashing, a sound of gunfire. What the hell was going on? I jumped to my feet, stumbling a little in my haste. I'd been wounded, and my leg hadn't ever really healed right, leaving me some pain and a limp.

More gunfire, more banging and crashing. Shouts and cries.

I clenched my fists, terrified of the worst, terrified to hope for the best.

There was a thump on the door to my cell.

"Cullen, get down!" a voice cried.

Immediately, I dropped to the floor, covering my head, pressing my body against the opposite wall.

"I'm coming in," the voice called again.

There was a crash, and the door splintered and fell into the room.

A hand holding a flashlight appeared, and I saw the outline of someone edging into the cell.

"Cullen, shit, are you ok?"

I tried to scramble to my feet, forgetting my bum leg and losing my balance.

"James?" I croaked, afraid to believe what I was seeing and hearing.

"It's me, you sonofabitch," he answered, "Man, are you all right? Can you stand?"

"Yeah, give me a sec." My knees buckled again under the weight of the realization of what was happening. Was I really being freed? Was this hell coming to an end?

James strode to me, reaching down to give me a hand, helping me to my feet.

"Damn, Edward," his voice was choked, "I was afraid I'd never find you."

"How did you find me?"

"Not now," he answered, "We've still gotta get the hell out of here. The rest of the guys are holding off the baddies. Come on. Fuck, you're thin!"

James pulled his sidearm from the holster and handed it to me.

"I hope you still know how to use this thing," he hissed, "You shoot while I haul your sorry ass out of here. Hang on!"

James stooped and before I knew it, he'd picked me up, putting me on his back in a fireman's lift.

"Hold on, man, we're gonna be moving fast."

James ran, and I hung on for dear life. I felt him climb a flight of stairs. From behind us, I heard the unmistakable sound of bullets flying by. James ducked and kept running. I raised my head and the pistol, and without hesitation, I instinctively pulled the trigger and fired. Once, twice. Two shots rang out, and the enemy soldier hot on our heels fell dead.

"Yes, you've still got it," James cried, "Almost there, Cullen. Just a few more feet. The guys are covering us. We're going to make it. We're just about outside now. Yes, we're safe! We made it. I'm taking you home to your Bella."

Bella…

James set me on my feet, helping me get my balance. It was then I began to cry. Hearing him say her name, knowing I could be with her again soon, the feeling swelled in me till I thought I could explode from the mere thought of my wife.

I looked up to the sky, seeing the stars for the first time in God only knew how long. I took in deep lungfuls of air, free air.

I turned to James, my friend, my brother in all but name, and I hugged him with all the strength I had. I noticed he was crying, too.

"How—what?" I spluttered, trying to find words, "How did you find me?"

"He never stopped looking," another guy said, "He's been looking for you since you were captured. He's been bribing informants, spending his free time trying to find clues."

"I couldn't go home and tell Bella that I left your sorry ass in the desert," James said, trying to play it down.

But I knew James. His words were often brusque or crass, but his heart was loyal and his courage was strong.

"Thanks, man," I said.

We hugged again. Then we turned away, each wiping our eyes, embarrassed and not embarrassed at the show of emotion.

"Let's move," James said, "We need to get you cleaned up and get on a plane for home."

"I thought everyone had left," I said.

"I begged the captain for one more chance to find you," he explained.

We came to an army jeep, and James assisted me into the passenger seat.

"I'd gotten word from an informant who knew where you were," James continued as we drove, "He knew the people who were holding you. When the word came down for us to go back stateside, I told the captain I knew where you were, and I wasn't going to leave without you. I'd face court martial first."

"Thanks, man," I choked out, fighting more tears, "Thanks for everything."

"You know you look like shit," he commented, "Nice beard though."

I laughed.

"I wish we could fatten you up before taking you home, but I promised myself I'd get you home by Christmas. That means leaving tomorrow morning, because tomorrow is Christmas Eve."

The joy that surged up in me at his words was nearly overwhelming. After so long of hanging on desperately to one tiny thread of hope, it seemed almost too good to be true that I could be home with my love by the next day.

"Don't I have to go through some kind of debriefing or something?" I asked.

"The captain agreed to let you go home first," James answered, "Unless you were in such bad shape you needed to be hospitalized, of course. Do you need to be hospitalized, or can that leg wait till your dad can look at it?"

"It can wait," I assured him.

"Good. So we'll go check in, get you cleaned up and then head for the base to get the fuck out of here."

"Does, does Bella know?" I asked.

"She was sent a telegram when you first went MIA," James said, "That's procedure. Don't kill me, but I didn't contact her with what I knew. I figured that until I knew for sure one way or the other, I didn't want to crush her hopes or build them up too high. You're not pissed at me?"

"No, I'm not pissed," I said, "I mean, what the hell could you have said? You saw I had been wounded and you saw me captured. That might have made it worse for her. I need to get to a phone."

"I'm taking you to a phone!"

James slapped me on the shoulder.

The next hours passed in a haze of activity. I spoke with people. I was checked out by a doctor. I was de-loused and got several shots with various antibiotics and other things I needed. I took a shower. I had some broth, because the doctor told me my body wouldn't be able to handle solid food.

I tried to call Bella three times between activities, but I always got the answering machine. Where was she? I knew by then that I'd been imprisoned for nearly a year and a half. Had she given up on me? Had she accepted that I was dead? Could she have moved on? If I had died, I'd have wanted her to move on, wanted her to live a happy life without me someday. But shit, the idea that she could have moved on while I sat in a cell nearly broke me.

Her outgoing message left me no clue.

"Hi, this is Bella. Leave a message."

"Stop that!' James snapped at me, when I told him my fears, "There's no way she'd give up on you, anymore than you would give up on her. Leave a damn message on the voice mail!"

"No, I don't want her to hear the news that way," I objected, "It might upset her too much to get a message like that."

"Whatever. Come on, let's get to the transport and get the hell out of Dodge."

Nearly 24 hours later, hours of travel, and finally, we were close. I was exhausted. My leg was sore and stiff, my limp more pronounced. We'd arrived in Seattle and James had rented a car.

"I know the way from here," I told him. I just wanted to be home.

"No way," he said, "Your leg is fucked up and you're still weak from lack of food and you're exhausted. I'm not getting you this far, risking my ass to save you, and having you get in a stupid accident on the road. I'm driving you all the way."

"Admit it," I joked, "You're just a sucker for happy endings. You want to see the reunion."

"That's it," he laughed.

I tried calling Bella before we got on the road from Seattle but got the damn answering machine again. I had tried when we transferred planes in New York with the same results. She could have been out, working, running errands. Hell, I didn't have a clue how my wife spent her days.

Only a little while longer, I told myself. I could hang in there that long. Couldn't I?

I almost started to cry again when we passed the Welcome to Forks sign.

"You ok?" James asked.

"Yeah, yeah, I'm fine," I scrubbed furiously at my eyes, "I just, well, there were many times I wondered if I'd ever see this place again."

"I know," James said quietly, "It had to have been horrible. But you're really safe, Edward. You're back in forks, and we're five minutes from your home."

We didn't speak for the rest of the drive. I found myself leaning forward, as if I could encourage the car to move faster, to get me home to my wife sooner.

"Turn there," I pointed, "That's our street. Our house is the third one on the left."

"Looks like a lot of cars in the driveway and parked on the street," James commented, "House is all lit up. Christmas party?"

"That Mercedes is my dad's car," I said.

James parked the car and turned off the engine.

"Well, man, here we are. This is it. Are you ready?"

I sat frozen in my seat for a minute. I stared at the house, longingly. Just on the other side of that door, my wife, my beautiful Bella was waiting. My dad was there for sure, maybe, probably the rest of my family too. I was scared. What would they think when they saw me?

"Come on, Edward," James coaxed, "It's going to be ok. Let's go. There's snow, and the sidewalk looks slippery. I'll stick with you to make sure you don't lose your balance. Come on. It's gonna be ok."

We got out of the car and started up the sidewalk. I slipped once, but James caught my elbow, holding on till we reached the steps to the front porch.

"Go ahead," he encouraged, "Just a few more steps, and you're home."

I started up the steps, taking each one slowly, carefully. It would have been a hell of a thing to fall on my ass at my own front door.

Just then I heard scratching at the door, and a high-pitched whine. Jake, our black lab, my constant shadow when I was home. Did he know it was me?

At last, I made it to the front door. I was shaking, shaking with hope, with fear, with excitement, with the deep burning need to see Bella and to hold her in my arms.

"Knock on the fucking door," James hissed.

I reached out my hand but froze again. Terrified of what lay on the other side of that door. What if Bella had someone else? Scared to knock, so scared. Scared not to knock, just so damn scared.

Jake's barking had turned frantic, and I heard his claws against the door.

I held my breath. I stared at the door, almost willing it to open. So I could start to breathe again, so I could finally live again.

"I'm here, baby," I whispered to the night, "I kept my promise. I made it home to you."

As I stared, willing myself to just knock on the damn thing already, I saw the doorknob begin to turn.

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><p><em>We have used some poetic license here. It is fiction, after all. We realize a soldier would never be sent home like that after having been in captivity for so long. But hey, how else would he be home for Christmas?<em>


	4. Chapter 4

**Disclaimer: We don't own Twilight**

_Thank you, Ninnie_89, for making a beautiful banner for this story! Check our profiles to see it!**  
><strong>_

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><p><strong>Bella<strong>

"Come on Jake, let's go for a walk," I said, my voice sounding loud in the house.

I walked over to the crib where David was lying on his back, playing happily with his feet. He was such a little angel, so content. His bright green eyes lit up when he saw me approaching, and he stretched out his arms to me with a little coo.

"Oh, honey," I whispered as I picked him up. "What would I do without you?" I held the warm little bundle against me for a moment, breathing in his sweet baby scent. I wrapped him up warmly and put on the baby carrier that helped me to tuck David against my chest.

My friends had warned me that David would become too dependent if I didn't put him in a normal stroller, but I refused. David was Edward's son, and I wanted to keep him as close as possible.

Once we were sufficiently guarded against the cold, I attached Jake's leash and guided the bouncing dog outside. I went into the forest behind the house immediately, not wanting to be seen by my neighbors. I was tired of their pitiful glances and supposedly-reassuring smiles.

I quickly found the trail I always used, murmuring to David and pointing out things to him in the forest. When we were far enough in the forest I unleashed Jake, and he sped off, chasing some unseen thing. He had missed Edward terribly at first, waiting at the door for him to come home and whining softly. But as time had passed, it seemed he had learned that his master would never return again.

Would Jacob still know Edward, should Edward ever come back?

Like every time I went out here to walk Jake, I briefly considered going to our meadow, the meadow Edward and I had found when we were hiking one day. A lovely clearing a little way into the woods. We had spent so many days there, making love in the warm afternoon air.

No, I couldn't go to that meadow. I wasn't ready to face that memory yet.

When David started to get cold, I called Jake back to me and returned back to the house. I would never get used to stepping into an empty home. Especially not on special days like Christmas Eve.

As Twilight started to set in outside, I took David to the rocking chair Esme got me when she learned I was pregnant. I crawled into it and exposed my breast so my son could feed. Rocking us gently, I tried to stop my tears from breaking through once more.

I missed Edward so much. Whoever said that it would become less over time, lied.

It got worse.

When David was done, I let him burp and then kept him in my arms for a while, enjoying his drowsy state after feeding, and playing a little bit with him. My growling stomach alerted me that I should eat something, and I realized I forgot to have lunch. Again.

I got up, placing a protesting David into his crib. In the other room, my phone rang.

"Hi, this is Bella. Leave a message." After the beep, only silence sounded before the line disconnected. I shrugged. Probably another solicitor, or a journalist. Especially around this time of year, they often tried to contact me for an interview. I always refused. I didn't want to tell my story for a newspaper or documentary. I didn't want to broadcast my so-called 'bravery.'

It was fully dark now outside. Just as I pulled some soup from my fridge, intending to heat it up in the microwave, the doorbell rang. Jake jumped up, barking at the sound and running to the door.

"I can't get any quiet today," I complained to myself. I considered just ignoring the visitor for a moment, but when the doorbell sounded again, I walked to the hallway.

"Who is it?" I asked.

"It's us," Alice's voice called, muffled through the wood.

I opened my front door and there everybody stood: Carlisle and Esme, Emmett and Rosalie, Alice and Jasper. Behind them, my father Charlie.

"What…" I started.

"If you don't want to come to us for Christmas, we come to you," Rosalie said, shrugging.

"But I have nothing in my fridge," I protested weakly, not sure if I was happy with this intervention.

Esme held up a pan. "We brought everything. You just have to let us in."

Their actions were so sweet, they brought a lump to my throat. Even if I wasn't sure I was up for company tonight, I couldn't deny their kindness.

I stepped aside to let them all in, holding Jake by his collar so he wouldn't be in the way. Almost everyone was carrying something and they marched into the kitchen in procession. Only Charlie was empty-handed, and as soon as I closed the door, he pulled me in for a hug.

"You hanging in there, kid?"

Only with my dad did I ever feel I could be completely honest. "No, not today," I whispered into his neck.

He hugged me a little tighter in reply, and when he pulled back, he wiped the tears under my eyes away with his thumbs. "Don't shut yourself off from us. We're here for you, you know that."

I smiled through my tears and we walked into the living room, where everybody was in a flurry of activity to create a cozy atmosphere in the room. Charlie went to David immediately, delighted when his grandson smiled in recognition.

We had a lovely dinner. Even though it was hard for me to admit, the distraction was welcome. The women all helped Esme in the kitchen as the men talked over beer. Charlie played with David and Jasper couldn't stop playing with Jake, who reveled in the extra attention.

It felt almost alien to have the house full of sound again. I had gotten so used to hearing the echo of my own footsteps, or the echo of his in my dreams, that it almost felt crowded to have so many people in the rooms.

Esme caught my gaze and pulled me in for a hug. "He would have wanted us to be together now," she said softly.

"He wants," I corrected quietly, non-accusingly. "He's not dead yet."

She pulled back, and I saw the tears brimming in her eyes. "No," she said, her sure voice at odds with her trembling chin. "He's not."

Emmett and Alice set the table and Rosalie took over feeding David, allowing me time and freedom to focus on my father and family-in-law. Rosalie was crazy about my son. I saw Alice looking closely as Rosalie cared for him. Rose would be a great mom, one day. I knew there was nothing more that she wanted than having children.

During a moment of silence, the phone rang again. The message on my answering machine sounded, and again, there was only silence before the line disconnected.

I looked into the direction of the phone, then shrugged and looked back at my company again.

"You still don't answer your phone?" Emmett asked.

"No. The only people I want to talk to know that they should start speaking after the beep. Silence usually means it's a marketer or something." I met Rose's eyes when I said this, referring to our earlier conversation that day.

"Some nerve to call on Christmas Eve," she commented.

"Don't you want to know who it was?" Emmett asked. "What if it wasn't a marketer?"

I shrugged. "Probably some journalist then, hunting for a story. It's not the first time today. I got some of those calls yesterday, too."

Jasper got up. "I want to see who it was." He came back with the phone in his hands. "Unknown number. Five missed calls. They sure were persistent."

"Well, if they wanted to talk to me so badly they could have at least identify themselves," I said, defensive.

"I know, sweetie," Alice said comfortingly, putting her arm around me.

"Well, let's have desert," Carlisle announced, trying to put some levity in the conversation.

We talked over ice cream and I put David to bed just after dinner. He was restless, probably because of all the people inside the house.

Emmett and Jasper took care of Jake, saving me from a trip out in the cold. It had started snowing in the meantime, a rarity in Forks.

We chatted more and watched some TV. However, the subject of conversation turned to Edward inescapably.

"I wonder where he is now," Esme said softly, her eyes tearing up. As his mother, she refused to believe her son was dead as long as she had not seen proof of that.

"He would have loved to be here," Rosalie said.

"His batch was sent home, I heard," I said quietly, for the first time saying out loud what I had known for some time. I had gotten a letter from the base, informing me that the group of soldiers Edward had been in was sent home.

Multiple gasps filled the room.

"What? When?" Rosalie asked.

I shrugged. "Some time ago, I don't know."

"And no word of Edward?" Carlisle asked quietly.

I shook my head, my lip trembling. "Wherever he is, they left him there. They went away without him." Tears spilled over as I thought of how Edward, assuming he was still alive, was now all alone in that godforsaken country. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you earlier. It's just… that message was like getting that telegram all over again."

Alice scooted closer to me and wrapped her arm around me once more. "I'm sure that, wherever he is, he's thinking of you right now. Dreaming of your face."

"He better be," I tried to joke, but it came out harsher than I intended.

"I wonder if we'll ever hear of him," she said quietly. "You know, even if he died, I just hope we get some clarity one day. So we know what we are dealing with."

"He's not dead," Esme said, much like she had told me earlier in the kitchen. "I can't believe that he is. I just can't."

"That's what keeps me going," I replied, my voice wavering. "If I let go of that hope, what do I have left?"

"You have David," Jasper said. "And us."

I shook my head. "I'm only half alive without Edward. I love David, with all my heart, but he may never know his father. Edward doesn't even know he has a son. I can't even…" I couldn't talk anymore, and I bit my lip harshly to try and stop my tears.

A hushed silence fell over us, interrupted by David's soft cries over the intercom. Without a word, I got up to comfort my child, hoping that my child could comfort me in turn. Normally I wouldn't go to him so quickly when he started crying, but today I didn't care. I needed him with me now.

I took him from his crib without a word and held him close, bouncing him a little to stop his heartbreaking little wails. "Don't cry, my sweet, no need for your tears," I murmured, kissing his head.

The conversation had moved on again when I came downstairs, holding David in my arms.

"Couldn't he sleep?" Alice asked.

"No, the little troublemaker," I said, smiling a little at the untruth of my words.

Alice stretched out her arms in a silent invitation to hold him and I handed him to her. She placed him on his lap and held him carefully, cradling him tenderly.

"He's such a beautiful child," she sighed.

"The spitting image of his father, I should say," Emmett observed.

"He's my reminder of it all," I said, smiling sadly. "He's a true angel. Sometimes it feels that my time with Edward was all just a dream. But then I see David, and I know that it wasn't."

"I wish _this_ was a dream," Esme said. "Every morning I wish I could wake up and know that my son is here, with you."

"I dream he's home, sometimes," I confessed. "Those nights are the worst."

Emmett stood up and crouched before me, placing his hand on my knee. "I'm sure it's the same for him."

I looked at the face of Edward's brother. Although the obvious signs like hair and eye color differed, I could easily see the similarities between Edward and him. The same jaw line, the same high forehead and cheekbones. Emmett was just bigger built.

"Thanks," I whispered, cupping his hand and holding it for a moment until Alice handed David back to me.

"Everyone?" she asked as Emmett had gone back to his place on the couch again, "I know it's not the best time, but I have an announcement to make," she said next. She moved to take Jasper's hand, and my mouth dropped open.

My gaze flitted to Esme and I saw the surprise and hope on her face as well. She grasped Carlisle's hand, and everyone in the room got expectant smiles on their faces.

Alice's hand drifted to her belly. "I'm pregnant," she whispered, tears welling up in her eyes.

Jake jumped up at the exclamations of joy and happiness, and everyone got up to congratulate Alice and Jasper.

I stayed on the sideline a little, not wanting David to get upset by the chaos. "Do you hear that, David?" I said softly, "You're getting a playmate!" My son looked at me with his bright, inquiring eyes, almost as if he actually understood.

The joy was bittersweet, but we tried to focus on the happy side. Alice was almost three months along. Her child would be a summer baby.

We talked some more, and it was running late. David absolutely refused to go back to sleep, so I decided to indulge him and keep him with me, needing him close. It was no use trying to get him to calm down. Not with such an excited atmosphere buzzing in the room.

Just before midnight, Jake suddenly got up and walked to the front door. He scratched at the frame, whining softly.

"Jacob, come back here," I ordered. I wasn't up to his nonsense tonight.

"Does he need to go out?" Emmett asked.

"No, he knows when it's the last time he's walked," I said. I turned into the direction of the door again. "Jacob!"

But my dog kept scratching and whining. When he yelped out a bark that definitely meant he had found something, I got up to check it out, keeping David in my arms.

"Probably some creature seeking shelter from the cold," Charlie said.

"Or maybe it's Edward," I joked half-heartedly over my shoulder. "He promised he'd come back to me, after all."

As I reached the door, Jake looked up at me expectantly, whining and pushing at the door with his head. He had obviously smelled something.

"What are you on to, Jake?" I asked, bouncing David on my arm. "What have you found?"

Jake reared up to his hind legs now, putting his front paws against the door and barking loudly. There seemed to be a desperate edge to his bark. Whatever was out there, he really wanted to go to it.

"Okay, okay, I'll open up, so you can see nothing's there," I muttered. I pulled him back by his collar, needing to use force to get him away.

Then I reached for the knob and opened the door.


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N We don't own Twilight**

_Merry Christmas Eve! Are you ready for that door to finally open?_

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><p><strong>Edward<strong>

The doorknob began to turn, and I watched in fascination. Slowly, too damn slowly, the door began to open.

Before I could get a good look at who had opened the door, 80 pounds of black lab descended on me. Jake whined and wiggled his entire body. His paws were on my chest, and he was licking every bit of my face. His shrill cries of doggy joy told me he'd missed me.

I looked up, my arms still full of dog and saw my Bella. My wife, still so beautiful. She looked tired and sad. She'd lost weight. But her eyes, those deep brown pools had always shown me her soul, and I could still see it shining there. Her hair was shorter.

And she was holding a baby. Not an infant but probably not a year old, though I didn't know shit about babies and their ages. I felt a flash of fear. This child, who was it? Was it, no, was he mine? I looked at him, his messy hair, just my color, and his green eyes, staring at me curiously.

I looked back at my Bella's face.

"Edward," she whispered.

One word, a breath of sound.

"Down, boy." I pushed Jake off me, patting his head, and I reached out to Bella.

Bella fell into my arms; I fell into hers. We kissed. We touched each other's faces. We cried, our tears mingling together.

"Are you real?" she whimpered, "Oh, Edward, are you really here?"

"I'm here baby; I'm really here."

The child between us squirmed and gave a little cry.

"Oh my God," someone whispered.

I looked to see Rose, my brother Emmett's wife.

"Edward," she began to cry, "Here, I'll take him."

She gently lifted the baby from between Bella and me, turning away to go into the other room.

Bella stepped back from my body, her hands gripping my shoulders.

She looked me over, her eyes gazing into mine, her hands running over me. She reached to stroke the beard I hadn't taken time to shave. She touched my hair, too long, though thankfully clean.

"You're so thin," she wept, "You look exhausted and hungry. But I never saw anything more beautiful in my life."

We held each other again, pressing our bodies as close together as we could possibly be.

"I waited so long for you," Bella murmured, "I never gave up. I waited."

"I know, love," I murmured into her hair, "I'm sorry it took me so long to get home. Every single day I was gone, I remembered my promise and never could quite give up hoping. It was you, the memory of your face. All those months in captivity, but I kept your face in front of me, and it helped me hang on. I couldn't have survived without knowing you were waiting for me."

She was kissing my face, every part of my face, as if she had to keep doing it to make herself believe I was real.

"How did you get free?" she started to ask, "Oh, hell, never mind. You must be freezing and hungry. Come in the house. Welcome home, my Edward."

I remembered James then, still standing behind me on the porch. Had five minutes passed since the door opened? It felt like an instant of time, and it felt like hours. I turned, motioning to James to come into the house.

"Oh!' Bella cried, noticing James, "I'm sorry, I didn't see you."

"No worries," James said, following us inside and closing the door behind him.

"Love, this is James Hunter, my friend from the army," I introduced, "I know I've told you a lot about him, and he's the reason I'm free. He found me and brought me home."

Bella released me and flung herself at James.

"Thank you, thank you," she cried, "You—you saved him. You saved me. I'll never be able to thank you enough."

Tears were pouring down her cheeks again as she hugged my best friend. I watched smiling, knowing that James had just become another member of our crazy family. Bella would never let him go off on his own now, and as soon as my mom heard what he'd done, she'd feel the same way.

"Hello, Bella," James said, "I love this guy, you know, like a brother, and I wasn't gonna let him stay behind when I was getting out. Don't cry now. It's all cool."

"Edward's told me so much about you," she said, "I hoped you'd visit us someday, and now, you've brought him home. You are welcome here anytime."

"Bells, honey?" I heard the voice of my father-in-law, "Rose is crying but she wouldn't say why."

Charlie turned the corner into the entry and saw me standing there. For the first time since I'd known him, I saw my gruff father-in-law break down. Normally a man who was uncomfortable with emotion, Charlie didn't seem to notice or mind, as tears streaked down his face. He rushed forward to me, wrapping his arms around Bella and me, hugging fiercely.

"Welcome home, son," he said.

Charlie let go, already pulling himself together.

"Everyone's here, Edward, come in. Your family has been waiting a long time."

He saw James and looked at him questioningly.

"James Hunter, sir," James stepped forward to shake hands.

"Ah, the army buddy. Come on in. Prepare to be hugged to death."

We all headed toward the living room. I could hear the murmur of voices, the tones questioning and anxious.

Bella clung to my hand. It seemed she was as afraid to let go as I was. I almost thought she'd disappear if I couldn't touch her in some way. I'd had so many dreams and hallucinations of her while imprisoned. Sometimes, I wondered if this was all real, or if it could be just another illusion.

I tugged on her hand to make her pause a moment. "Bella?" I asked softly, "The baby?"

"Your son," she smiled over at me, "I discovered I was pregnant the day before I got the telegram saying you were missing. He's been the thing to keep me hanging on during all these months."

I couldn't describe the feeling inside me at her words. A son. My son, my child, mine and Bella's. We had created him in our love. What should have been a happy time for her, a time we would have shared together, had been a time of torment for her, a time of the uncertainty of not knowing what had happened to me. I pulled her closer to me.

"I hate that you had to go through all that, love, but I'm here now. I won't be leaving again."

We walked into the family room. My eyes swept the gathering. My parents, my brother and sister with their spouses. Everyone was talking and they didn't notice us at first. Then they looked up and saw us standing in the doorway.

A beat of silence.

"Edward!" a shriek, and my sister tackled me.

She was only seconds ahead of my mother.

And mom was only seconds ahead of Dad, and then Emmett, and Jasper, my brother-in-law. Only Rose held back, still holding my son.

Chaos reigned for a few minutes. I couldn't really hear what the individuals were saying, because everyone was talking at once. Their voices were shrill with disbelief, joy, tears. I was crying again, and they were all crying too.

"Back off everyone!" my father barked then, "Don't crowd him too close. He looks like he's about to collapse."

I felt like I was about to collapse. I was crying and weak as a fucking kitten, shaky from the long hours of travel and the intense emotions of the reunions. But surrounding and filling all of that was the feeling of safety, of being secure with my wife beside me and wrapped in the circle of the love of my family.

Eveyrone stepped back a little, but they didn't stop uttering their words of joy and disbelief. My mother's voice broke through the rest, as she took my face in her hands.

"You will never do that to me again!" she cried, "Not to me, or your father, or your wife. Never! Do you understand me?"

"Never, Mom," I said, hugging her.

At last, everyone began to calm down, and each of them stopped to touch me and say a word of welcome.

Emmett punched my shoulder, and I winced, hoping my crazy big brother hadn't noticed.

"It's about time you got your ass back here, bro'," he said.

"Good to have you back," Jasper said in his calm way, but his eyes were misty.

"Welcome home, son," Dad choked finally, "I'm so thankful, so happy." His eyes studied me for a long time, his practised doctor's gaze taking in my condition.

"Are you wounded?" he asked quietly.

"Nothing urgent," I shook my head, "I mean, I know you'll want to check me out, and I've got a bad leg, but I'm ok. Just tired and hungry and so damn relieved to be home."

"We'll discuss that in a minute," Dad promised, not believing me at all.

I saw James, standing awkwardly in the background and waved him forward into the mix.

"Everyone, this is my friend, James. You've heard of him. We were in the army together, and he is the one who kept searching for me and found me."

The rush to hug and welcome James was nearly as wild as the one for me had been. I couldn't help laughing, as I watched my tiny sister jump to put her arms around his neck to kiss him. My mom hugged him and whispered in his ear. My dad shook his hand and welcomed him to the family.

While all the welcoming was going on, I kept looking over at Rose, still holding our child. I realized I didn't even know his name. Rose was smiling, tears still in her eyes, speaking softly to the baby.

Bella had stepped aside to let my family greet me, but noticing my gaze, she came to me and led me toward Rosalie.

"Welcome home, Daddy," she said.

Rose placed the child in my arms, and I clutched him against me. My legs felt weak, and I sank onto the nearest sofa. Bella sat beside me, sitting as close to me as she could be.

"Edward, I'd like you to meet David Edward Cullen, your son," Bella told me.

I was crying again. Looking down at his tiny face, I reached one finger to stroke the soft skin of his cheek. He gazed back at me. He almost seemed to know me.

"Hello, little boy," I crooned, "I'm your daddy. I'm so happy to meet you. You'll never know how happy."

"Ga," he cooed.

I chuckled.

I heard laughter around me. Everyone was watching us, and everyone seemed to be crying again.

"It's a true Christmas miracle," Dad said, "We prayed for your return every day and night. Bella never gave up hope. Neither of us did, I must say."

Dad gave me a hard look, taking me in, and turned to face the family.

"Could you all give me a moment alone with Edward?" he asked, "Please, just a minute or two. Bella, of course, don't move. I just want to talk to my son about medical things."

They all shuffled out, casting looks over their shoulders. It seemed it was hard for them all to believe I was truly home.

"Ok, Edward," my father began began, "Tell me the truth now."

I sighed. I reached for Bella's hand, clutching it tightly, as I still held David in my other arm.

"I have notes in my bag," I explained, "You've seen my leg. There's also a battery of tests they want me to have, and a special liquid diet, until my body is strong enough to handle solid food. They didn't want to let me come home, but since you are a doctor, they did, giving me a shit load of info for you."

"Ok, I knew there had to be more. You are not well."

"No, but I will be," I stated firmly.

It was true. I knew the most important thing I needed was to be home, with my wife and child, with my family. They would all help put me back together.

Dad went to bring the family back to us, and once everyone settled down, we sat around chatting for a while. Sensing I wasn't ready to talk about my time in captivity, they focused mainly on James and let him tell the story of how he found me and freed me.

Jake had followed my every move, sticking close, as if he expected me to disappear again. Nobody wanted to leave, I guessed, but I was feeling the exhaustion, fighting to keep my head up and my eyes open.

Charlie had been watching quietly. He caught the movement, as I slumped against Bella and then forced myself to sit upright again. He stood and looked around at all the happy faces.

"Edward looks exhausted," he spoke, "Why don't we let them have some time to themselves now? I know everyone wants to stay close, but he'll be here tomorrow. Won't you, son?"

He fixed me with a stern glare.

"Yes, sir, I'm never leaving again."

His glare seemed to warn me that I'd sure as hell better not be going anywhere again.

"Then let's all go home," Charlie continued, "We'll all be here tomorrow for Christmas Day."

"Yes, you're right," my father agreed, "Come on Esme, honey. I know you don't want to stop looking at him, but let's let Bella and Edward have some time together. We'll see them tomorrow. And Edward, I'll want to examine you tomorrow."

I nodded.

"James, you come with us," Esme told him.

"I can get a hotel room, ma'am," he replied, "I don't want to put you out."

"Nonsense," Esme retorted, "You brought my son home, and there's no way you're sleeping in a hotel. Besides, didn't you hear my husband say you are part of the family now? We have a lovely guest suite, and you'll be staying there."

I grinned over at my buddy.

"No sense arguing with her," I told him, "Mom always gets her way. And she's gonna try to get more details out of you."

He smiled. He hadn't had anyone give a damn about him in a very long time.

"Thank you Dr. and Mrs. Cullen," he said, "I appreciate the hospitality." James came over to shake my hand.

"Congratulations on your son," he said, "I'm so happy for you."

Bella hugged him.

"Thank you, James," she said, "Thank you for not giving up. Thank you for bringing him home to us."

She kissed his cheek.

Everyone said goodbye, and at last, we were alone, just my wife, our son and me. And Jake of course, who still hadn't strayed far from my side.

"Look, he's gone to sleep," she said, nodding at David, "You have the magic touch."

"He's so beautiful," I told her.

"Let's put him to bed and then put you to bed. You look like you could fall down if a breeze brushed by you."

Bella ran her hands through my hair, and I shivered with pleasure at the familiar feel of her hands, a touch I had feared I'd never know again.

"I love you," I said, suddenly realizing I hadn't told her yet since I'd gotten home.

"I love you," she answered, "Come on. David's room is the one across the hall, the one we always intended to be the nursery."

I stood in the doorway, watching as Bella tended to David, changing him, tucking him into his crib. I joined her once he was tucked in, kissing his cheek, whispering goodnight.

"I love you, my son," I whispered, marveling at saying those words for the first time.

"Come, Edward, let's go to bed."

Bella took my hand, leading me across the hall to our bedroom.

"You know, you look like a cave man with that beard," she teased, "But I can see you're gonna fall asleep on your feet any minute. Let me help you get out of those clothes and into bed."

We climbed into bed, each of us sliding to meet the other, entwining ourselves in each other.

With a groan and a contented sigh, Jake curled up on my side of the bed.

"I need to hold you," I told my wife, "I can't—can't do anything else, you know."

I felt embarrassed at the admission, but Bella, who always knew the right thing to say or do, just rubbed my back and murmured loving words to me.

"I know, baby, I know," she said, "I'm here, I've got you, and I'm not going anywhere. Rest in my arms now. We have all the tomorrows in the world for everything else."

"Bella?"

"Hmmm," she murmured against my chest.

"Baby, I kept my promise, I came home."

"Took you long enough," I felt her smile against me, "Thank you for keeping that promise, love."

"I'm going to make you a new one," I said, holding her closer, "I promise I will never make a choice to leave you for any reason again, no matter what the supposed higher purpose might be. I'm staying right here with you and with David. I'll be here to stand beside you through life. You'll never have to go through any of it alone again. I promise."

"I'll hold you to that," she answered.

Later, as I lay in my wife's arms, for the first time since I couldn't even remember, I felt safe. I felt whole, after being only half a man for so long. I felt alive. It felt so damn good to be alive!


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N We don't own Twilight**

_Thank you all so much for the wonderful response to our story! We wrote this to thank our faithful readers, but also to honor the people who served, and we wrote this in honor of the fact that the US troops have finally left Iraq. We wrote this in honor of the families who have waited for their loved ones to come back home again. In honor of those that have had to pay the ultimate sacrifice. _

* * *

><p>Opening my eyes, I stretched languidly. Edward was next to me, sleeping peacefully. Sensing that I was awake, he scooted closer to me and enveloped my body with his.<p>

"Merry Christmas," I murmured.

"Merry Christmas," he whispered back.

I closed my eyes again and thought back to this day a year ago, the day after Edward had come home after having been held captive by rebels for over a year.

I woke up that next morning, wrapped up in Edward. His arms were wrapped around my waist and his head was nestled in the crook of my neck. Our legs were intertwined, as if he never had been away. The glorious feeling overwhelmed me and I started crying instantly, my body shaking with the sobs I couldn't control.

"Baby?" Edward's groggy voice sounded. He lifted his head. "What's wrong?"

"I'm just so glad you're home," I whispered through my tears. "It's almost impossible to believe that you're really here."

He held me tighter, and while part of me reveled in being held by him like that, I couldn't prevent myself from noticing that he had lost a lot of strength during his time in captivity. My chest cracked when I realized that my worst nightmares, save for the one in which he didn't survive, must have been his reality for all those months he was a prisoner.

"I'm here," he whispered, unaware of my mental chaos. "I'm here."

He kissed my cheek sweetly, and then when I turned my head to face him, his lips touched mine. I felt like I was melting to have his velvet mouth kissing me again. How long had I longed for this?

In the other room, David started crying.

"Do you want to go?" I asked Edward.

He looked bashful, shy. "I know nothing about parenting, Bella, I... I'm not sure if I would do it right."

I smiled and kissed him in reassurance. "We can learn together then." I slid out of bed. "Don't go anywhere," I warned him.

"Never again," he replied, and he looked so sincere that I nearly choked up again.

David stretched his arms out at me the moment I appeared above his crib. I quickly changed his diaper, daydreaming a bit of the joy it would bring to have Edward help me with this. I couldn't wait for him to get to know his son, and I couldn't wait for my son to get to know his dad. David was still so young, he would never remember that there was a time when his father wasn't around.

Another miracle, if you asked me.

Cradling David in my arms, I walked back to the bedroom. I had put David in his own room when I kept waking him up at night with my dreams, startling him with my cries. I would have loved to keep him closer, but I had to consider his well-being.

For the first time in all those months, I wasn't apprehensive to open my, our, bedroom door again. Because this time, Edward would be in that bed, waiting for me. Unable to stop my smile, I opened the door.

Edward was sleeping again. His hand outstretched over my pillow, as if he was looking for me, his eyes closed, his face peaceful. I smiled again, so unbelievably happy to have him home. Carefully so as not to startle him, I slid into the bed again. When I brushed his hand, he awoke with a jolt, the fear clear in his eyes.

"Ssh," I said, "It's just me. Don't be scared."

He calmed when he recognized me, recognized the room he was in. "I'm sorry," he stammered.

"Don't be," I soothed. "I didn't mean to startle you."

He swallowed thickly. "I'm afraid it might be a while before I can sleep restfully again."

Our gazes locked for a long moment. "Was it bad?" I finally asked quietly, referring back to his time in captivity.

He looked away, and that for me was answer enough.

Now it was my turn to swallow. "Did they hurt you?"

He didn't look back up at me when he nodded.

"Oh no," I whimpered, my voice breaking as I choked up with tears once more.

In one quick movement he was with me, wrapping his arms around me and his son. He hid his face in the crook of my neck and I felt rather than heard his sobs. I held him against me, rocking him gently until he had calmed down again somewhat.

"Only thinking of you gave me the strength to go on," he said. "But I don't want to think of that time. Not now, not now I'm here, with you, with... with my son." His hesitation when he mentioned his son was clear, but so was the unadulterated pride in his voice.

"I just need to feed him, and then it's high time you get to know him, don't you think?" I asked softly.

He nodded both solemnly and eagerly, and started to move to leave the bed.

"Where do you think you're going?" I asked playfully.

"Ehm, to the kitchen?" he said, confused. "You said you wanted to feed him?"

"I did. Come here," I invited, patting the bed where he had just been lying. When he crawled back next to me, I closed my eyes for a moment to simply enjoy his heat next to me again.

I positioned David, who was looking quite eager, and looked at Edward. "I still breast feed him," I explained quietly. To my own amazement, I felt some trepidation about exposing my breast. Edward was my husband, but I hadn't seen him in almost a year and a half, and he hadn't seen me, either. It felt almost weird to expose my body to him.

But David was hungry, and Edward had seen me countless times before he left. So I scooted down until I was lying on my side, facing Edward, and exposed my breast. I guided David to the nipple with practiced ease and smiled at Edward's awed expression.

"That may just be the most beautiful thing I've ever seen," he said, his voice hushed. Carefully, he cupped the back of David's head as David drank happily. After a while, I switched breasts, until he was full and I could let him burp.

"Now, go sit with your daddy," I crooned at David and Edward held out his arms as I handed his son over to him.

It didn't surprise me to see the silent tears falling down his face as he took in his son. He had seen him the day before, for sure, but in all the fuss and the hurry there hadn't been much quiet time for him. Now, I watched as my husband got to know the miracle that was his child.

"He's such an angel," I told Edward. "He rarely cries. He plays for hours by himself. He's never fussy. I couldn't have asked for a sweeter child."

Edward just cried and said nothing, and I sat in bed with him as we both basked in our overwhelming emotions.

Our little bubble was interrupted by the doorbell. Jake barked, alarming us that there were visitors. I slipped into my robe and left David with Edward as I went downstairs to open the door.

Carlisle and Esme stood on the porch, beaming.

"Come in. We were still in bed," I explained a little bashfully, gesturing at my robe.

They both smiled. "No worries," Esme said. "I just couldn't wait one more minute to see my son again, as you will understand."

"Of course," I replied, hugging her fiercely. "You know I really couldn't believe it when I opened my eyes this morning?"

"I bet," Carlisle said.

"Where's James?" I asked.

"Alice and Jasper arrived over this morning. They are keeping him company," Esme said, smiling.

I smiled back, happy that the man that saved Edward's life - and by extent of that, mine - was taken care of. I guided them further into the house and saw that Carlisle had brought his black leather doctor's bag with him.

"I'll go tell Edward you're here," I said, turning to the stairs.

"Or we can come up with you?" Esme proposed. "I suppose you have to tend to David there, anyway?"

I nodded and they followed me up the stairs. As we reached the bedroom, I saw how Edward was playing with David, the little child crowing with laughter in Edward's arms.

"Oh," Esme breathed, her hand pressed against her sternum. "What a sight."

Edward looked at us when he heard his mother's voice, and his gaze softened into sadness. I went to Edward quickly to take David from him, so that he could greet his parents again.

When he rose from the bed, clad only in his boxers, Esme gasped audibly, alarmed. Carlisle's lips pressed together in agony. Having seen the state of Edward's body the night before I wasn't as surprised, but I could understand their reactions.

Edward was painfully thin. He bore the marks of hardship in scars all over his body. He was limping, a broken leg that had never properly healed. But most painful to me were the scars he had psychologically. His stance was no longer straight, but hunched. A slight tremor had settled over his body, and only when he slept was he completely still. His eyes looked gaunt, his cheeks were hollow.

He was lucky to have all his teeth still, as well as his fingers and toes, I thought with a shudder.

Carlisle stepped forward. "I brought my bag, Edward. You would oblige me if I could check you out."

Edward nodded. "I've been waiting for that. The file with all the documents is in my pack, downstairs."

"I'll get it," Esme said quickly, and she disappeared. From where I stood, I could see her wiping her eyes as soon as she was out of Edward's sight. Poor woman.

Carlisle asked Edward to sit on the edge of the bed and hung his stethoscope around his neck.

"I'll go get David dressed," I said quietly. "I'm not sure if you want me here."

Edward grasped my wrist before I could move to leave. "Always. I need you with me always." Again there was that desperate edge to his voice when he spoke.

I bent to kiss his forehead, and felt his trembling arms wrap around my waist. "I promise you I will be right back."

At that moment, Esme came back up the stairs. "Let me handle your son, so you can help mine," she said softly, and she took the child from my arms. David was happy to go with his grandma, and I saw Edward's eyes lit up when he saw how familiar his mother was with his child.

"Okay, Edward, let's begin," Carlisle said. He went through the documentation Edward had brought home with him, and asked questions on the go. He listened to his heart, took his blood pressure, and checked his reflexes. He checked Edward's bad leg for movement range. He examined some of the scars that looked fresher than the others.

"Were you tortured?" Carlisle asked quietly.

Edward slid his hand over the mattress, seeking mine so he could grasp it tightly. "Yes."

Carlisle swallowed. "I won't ask you to go into details, but what did they do?"

Edward had to take a deep breath before he could speak. "Beatings, mostly. Sleep deprivation, starvation. Isolation, too. All the time I was there, I only saw someone when they brought me food. I saw little daylight."

His voice was almost emotionless, and I felt my chest crack under the weight of his confession. It must have been horrible beyond comprehension.

"Okay, son. Thank you for telling me. I think that in a while, we will have to find a therapist for you to unload some of your experiences on, don't you think?"

Edward nodded. "This morning when Bella came back to bed and I woke up again, I was so scared... I thought I was back there all over again. I think I upset Bella with my fear."

"No, you didn't upset me," I objected quietly. "I was just worried about you. You looked so frightened."

Edward closed his eyes in distress. "I'm sorry."

"Those wounds will take longest to heal," Carlisle said meaningfully. "But let's get your physical health better again first. I will go to the hospital today and get you the fluid food that you need right now. I can also bring back the things I need to draw some blood."

Edward nodded, and I could tell that he was exhausted again after this short amount of time.

"Why don't you lie back now," I said softly. "Rest for a while. I'll go and make you some broth, and after that, we can try to get you cleaned up a little."

He was clearly pained by the notion of having to rest again, but with Carlisle and me coaxing him, he finally lay back against his pillow and closed his eyes.

"I'll be right back," I said, kissing him softly. He was already half asleep.

It took a long time for Edward to become himself again. After that first morning, he slowly started to get used again to being free. This manifested itself in the tiniest, strangest things. For example, he had a hard time eating when he wasn't told to do so. He didn't go outside alone easily. He was nervous, apprehensive. I caught him looking over his shoulder more than once when we were walking Jacob.

But he fought, because he always had been a fighter. He moved on from fluid food to solid things, and with that, his appetite truly returned. His limp would never fully heal again, but he saw a physical therapist who gave him exercises to make his leg stronger. Slowly but surely, his strength returned in both body and soul. His stance got straighter, his walk lighter. He smiled more often. The nightmares became less frequent.

He got to know David. David took to his father as if he had always been around. Edward was there to see his son's first steps. We both cried that day.

And Edward and I got to know each other again. However much I had missed him, I had to get used again to having someone else in the house. We sometimes felt like strangers living under the same roof - even though we were the same people, we had both changed during our time apart.

Edward solved that problem handsomely by asking me out on a date. He made reservations at the Italian restaurant where we had had our very first real date, as well. He courted me as if we weren't really married, and we fell in love all over again.

It took a little time before we were both ready to be intimate again. Edward had to get into better shape first, health wise, before his body would function. But even when he told me, quite proudly and with a playful smirk, that he was fully operative again, we didn't jump into bed immediately. We took our time to get reacquainted, and the rediscovery was sweet, so sweet.

When we finally came together, we both cried a little, and when our eyes met, I knew we both understood. We had made it. We were back to 'us.'

As soon as the weather allowed it, we packed a picnic basket and set out for our meadow again. Filled with bluebells, it was a tiny piece of heaven in the middle of the woods. David found wonder after wonder in the grass, and Jacob rolled around in the flowers, clearly enjoying a good mood.

In that meadow, I told Edward how I never had come back here during the time he was away. He hugged me and as David slept next to us, he rolled on top of me and kissed me sweetly for hours, tangling his hands in my hair and tasting my lips with his. I had my arms wrapped around his shoulders, feeling the returning strength in his muscles, and loved him beyond comprehension.

It was a beautiful day.

James was a big part of our lives. He lived with Carlisle and Esme until he could find a place of his own. Charlie kept his word and offered James a job at the station. James accepted with a huge grin and turned out to be an excellent employee.

Our friends and family were there for us as they had been there for me. It felt wonderful to have such a strong support system. It helped Edward heal, I was sure.

Summer trickled by, and ended with heavy rains and wind. Edward felt strong enough to start some courses to freshen up and finish his medical training. If all went well, he might graduate in the next spring.

One weekend when the weather was exceptionally bad, I stretched in bed languidly and turned to my other side, feeling Edward slide up against me behind me, wrapping his strong arms around my waist. We had brought David over to Carlisle and Esme for the weekend, and on that Sunday morning we stayed in bed late.

"I love you," he whispered, kissing the back of my neck.

"I love you too," I replied, pressing back against him.

His fingertips started a wandering path over my naked body, exploring the places he knew so well. I responded to his touch, adjusting my position to accommodate him. When he finally crawled on top of me, I was burning with need.

The festive days approached, and I was looking forward to them as much as Edward and the rest of our families. By the time Thanksgiving rolled around, I almost couldn't wait for the family to leave us before I could tell Edward my news.

I was pregnant again. And this time, he would be here during my pregnancy, and he would be with me when the baby would be born.

Edward's eyes shone with unshed tears as he kissed first my mouth, and then my belly in utter reverence. It was a beautiful, beautiful moment. We got a second chance, so to speak. And this time, we would do it right.

Christmas arrived, and we celebrated Christmas Eve at our house again. Alice and Jasper brought their baby, six months old, and we laid her to sleep in her travel crib in David's room.

We all reminisced how the previous Christmas Eve had gone. I remembered joking, when Jake was scratching at the door, that it might be Edward standing on the porch. Edward looked up when I said that. I had never told him that. We also laughed about how I had refused to pick up the phone, not knowing it had been Edward who had desperately been trying to call me. We laughed about Edward's stubbornness as well, when he had refused to leave a message.

James, who was with us, laughed. "Told you so, Edward," he grinned.

After dinner, Carlisle served wine. I refused, and when his eyes met mine, I winked. He smiled brightly and sat down immediately, giving Edward and me the floor to speak.

Everybody in the room was immediately silent, and all Edward had to do was place his hand over my nearly four-months-along belly. We'd purposely waited for Christmas to tell them. Thanksgiving had been too soon, but this was the perfect moment. Esme cried, Alice cheered, Rosalie bit her lip and clasped Emmett's hand. The men smiled, happy I hoped for Rosalie that she would find her happiness in motherhood soon, as well.

We got our congratulations and celebrated this most special Christmas together. After everybody had gone home, I kicked off my shoes and plopped down on the couch.

"I am still so happy to be here, with you, every day," Edward said as he sat down next to me, pressing a kiss to my temple.

"I am happy every day to have you here," I replied, nestling in his embrace.

"I'm glad I was able to keep my promise."

"Me, too," I said softly, my eyes falling closed. It had been his promise that had made us survive this ordeal. The promise of knowing that things would be all right.

The promise of hope.

_The end_

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><p><em>Merry Christmas!<em>


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